12:37am randoms

i'm so sleepy right now, and i don't know what motivated me to write an entry.

i realize that my last entry could be misinterpreted as sarcastic. hopefully it was only read by people who know me well enough to know that i really do find dating ugly men to be highly difficult.

aaaaahhhaa gotchaaa (or not)

*edit: hopefully it was only read by people who know me well enough to know that i did NOT mean "if only it was that easy" to date ugly men. [the last line was meant to sound sarcastic! i'm not that horrible, i promise.] what i really meant by it was -- if only it was that easy to date just to date.

what i forgot to mention though, was she encouraged me to sign up with match.com.
L.O.L.
story: sometime in sophomore year, i was at a friend's off-campus apt just hanging out. we were so bored, i came up with the idea to sign up with eharmony. after about half an hour of filling out the most detailed survey about myself, i was congratulated for being eligible and was sent matches to my email within 10 minutes. my guy friend, who went after me, was unfortunately rejected. it's ok, we laughed it off because it was just all fun and games.

funny thing is, as stewpid and crazy as eharmony, match.com, or christiansingles may seem, they actually work. a friend of a friend (christian, attractive, intelligent, and supposedly really picky [lol]) is now actually dating someone she received an email from via one of these websites. a relative of another is happily married (yay eharmony) and even appeared on one of the commercials.

i absolutely dislike hook-ups/ set-ups/ whatever (esp with men >4 years older than me... but on a sidenote: can i seriously not feel like a victim of pedophilia when an older guy is interested? can i look older than 18 already?), which is why i don't see myself dating in a long time. my ideal way of liking someone is through natural occurrences, and so far, my lack of a social life has been deterring me from meeting anyone new (let alone catching up with anyone...... old... not age-wise, but... yeah). and being in grad school won't really help either.

does that mean i'm going to end up marrying someone i already know.........?

oh goodness, may i move on.

i think i'm getting a cold AGAIN. i missed my morning work session today because i wasn't feeling too well, but i sucked it up for my afternoon session and i half-regretted it. i was feeling a headache and a minor fever, and dealing with a 4-year-old child with autism, who for some reason today did NOT cooperate and went buckwild on me, did not alleviate anything. nothing at all, i say.

i don't understand how i'm gaining weight when all i eat these days is rabbit food. or maybe i'm not. maybe i'm eating really good food but forgetting about it every time i eat something weaksauce because i just wanna be a whiner and pity myself. or maybe it's because i'm about to enter that time of the month. or maybe it's because i don't get enough exercise every day. and maybe it's also because i only drink a cup or two of water a day. seriously, someone needs to invent something for people who don't drink enough water. i put effort into it sometimes by carrying around a tumbler or a water bottle, but i lose it wayyy before i even remember to take a drink out of it again.

i'm hungry.